10 March, 2008

Creative Writing, Health, And NYR Update

Tonight was great. The air felt alive with the energy of Anakin as he makes his decision to join the dark side or continue on the road he's already chosen. The setting sun only served to clarify this energy. Darkness snaked long fingers around corners and into tree branches, yet light still glistened on grass blades and windowpanes. It was the kind of evening that, when one wears a jacket, is pleasant. The lukewarm air whispered on one's cheek. It filled the lungs easily, and made one want to sing just so one could breathe another lungful. Dampness crept into collars and under pant legs, snuggling against hot skin and chilling it. Going inside felt like a tragic loss. (What do you think of that? Breka, I'm 'specially interested in your opinion, if you have one...)

Last week, I got my gallbladder ultrasounded. Funny story: Nurse picks up a file for a female patient, aged 22, who is here for an ultrasound. She assumes I'm pregnant, and stares at me trying to figure out why I'm getting an ultrasound when it's obvious the baby's not big enough to really notice on the ultrasound. Heh. Final ultrasound results: Normal. I have no gallstones (and just for the record, I am not pregnant either :-P ). The doc thinks I might have "sludge" (precursor to gallstones) in there, so on Wednesday I get to drink radioactive goo and trace it through my gallbladder just to see what happens. Kinda yucky...but hopefully it will clarify SOMETHING. Also, I'm beginning to wonder if this pain is, in fact, my gallbladder. Tonight I had an estimated total of 28 grams of fat during dinner, which is a LOT considering I've been mostly vegan for the past two weeks. I have pain, but nothing abnormal. However, when I tasted JPB's rum on Sunday night I had almost instant pain that lasted for hours. The doc warned me that alcohol would have the same effect as fat...hmm. PS- being vegan ain't bad. The food is great, though it drastically slims down menu choices at Eat'n'Park. Which is a terrible restaurant anyway.

New Year's Resolution Update: So far, I have bought only one thing that's brand new this year (besides perishables etc.), which was a racquet for my gym class. Kinda necessary. It's freeing, actually, to not buy stuff. I don't feel a need to flip through magazines or go to stores looking for good buys, because I can't buy it anyway. However, I am getting slightly worried about shoes. I'll be needing a pair of dress shoes and dress sandals very soon, and permanently borrowing Mom's would be cheating since she'd just go out and buy herself a brand new pair anyway. And dressy footwear shouldn't really be duct-taped.


acalvetti said...

Can you get me some of that goo? I wanna try it too! HEE HEE HEE!

Fuzzy said...

you know after you haddn't posted for about two weeks, I was beginning to assume the worst.

Your galbladder rips out of your adbomen a la Alien and gets into the ductwork.

regarding the Vegan thing, I'd like to post a reminder that March 15 is international Eat A Tasty Animal for PETA day! Get your Carnivore on!

Jon Daley said...

Hrm - I hadn't heard of the "eat a tasty animal day" before.

It is as some folks like to say: if God did want us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat??

Or, the opposite: I don't eat vegetables because I dislike meat - I just really hate plants.

Also, I forgot to tell you how we are doing on your New Year's resolution... I bought a pair of gloves since I showed up at Seven Springs without them on one of the coldest days of the year, ugh. Heather just bought me a pair for Christmas. I bought some books at Jubilee. We are about to buy a house, though it is used, so I guess that doesn't count. We will have some new purchases to go along with the house though.

Laedelas Greenleaf said...

A: It was delivered intravenously, and I had no way of storing any if I got it. Sorry.

F: I don't get the alien reference, but thanks for rubbing meat in the vegan wounds...wait, that doesn't make sense, does it?

JD: I didn't know I had company on my NYR travails, I mean, travels! (just kidding) Thanks for the update--the pics of your house look great!

Breka said...

So I somehow missed this post last time but...You honestly want to know what I think of the beginning description? Honestly? Hope so.
I'm saying this only 'cause I'm your friend and your former editor and I'm still evil but I know you can take it.
I'm thinking - not so great. Actually, rather cumbersome. The second sentence was awkward, but has a fun feeling. If you'd kept that mocking tone and stuck with the 'theme' you started you might have had something. Just in there on it's own, though, it's not really working. It sounds like it's trying to be clever and cleverness should feel effortless.
Good thoughts, though, you conveyed a bit of atmosphere. Unfortunately, most of it was lost in the cumbersome syntax and strange juxtaposition of words. Using 'great' and a reference to Star Wars to start off, and then throwing in words like 'yet', 'pleasant' 'clarify' and 'ones' keeps you from establishing a tone and stops the sentences from flowing together.
'Darkness snaked long fingers around corners and into tree branches' I like that. I like it a lot. Light on grass blades is good, too, (I might leave out windowpanes because they're overused), but that whole sentence is unwieldy. Play with it and it will come out right.
All in all, I'd say that it has potential but lacks flow and a cohesive tone. The paragraph has the feeling of a lot of ideas about the evening thrown together; it doesn't really convey the evening itself.
Aren't you glad you asked? Aren't you glad I'm not your editor anymore? ;-)