16 November, 2006

Gone...You Pretend Like You're Immortal

Tomorrow I will be leaving for a good friend's college to participate in their annual hoedown. I am not sure why I am doing this, as it seems to be irresponsible or unwise when one considers the time I have available and the money I have budgeted for such a trip. In both cases, there simply isn't enough. And yet I go.

I go because I am escaping for a few days away from the stress. I'll be bringing schoolwork with me, but something strange has been going on. I'm stressed out, and it's not like finals week stress where I can see an end to it, and it's not just limited to one area of my life. I am sleeping less well than ever and when I do sleep, my dreams are full of bad situations and images that don't help me rest much.

I go to step away from the future in order to analyze it. I had finally decided that I was definitely going to try for art school, when my parents mentioned my goal of teaching in Namibia. They encouraged me to renew my efforts in that dream and this has changed my mindset completely. Art school is still tantalizing, but certainly no where near as tantalizing as spending time in Namibia working for the glory of God. So I hope to find direction as I stop thinking about it for a while.

I go to have fun! I am greatly anticipating the fellowship there, as every PHC'er I've met has been of like mind and temperament in so many ways to myself. I love dancing, and conversation with intellectual peers should prove to be stimulating.


Jason said...

So... do you have a report on the hoedown coming? Or are you still trying to catch up on homework? :-)

Laedelas Greenleaf said...

It's coming...sort of. I see no end of homework until Christmas, so I might post at 4 AM on an all-nighter as relief for my brain :-Pno